Yesterday, Oleg wanted to ride his scooter over to the school playground (after school hours). I talked Emma into going with him (not quite ready to let him out on his own). And Lena went, too.
About 20-30 min. later Oleg returned and said to me, "Where is Lena?" I thought he was messing around (because he likes to do that), so I didn't take it very seriously. I responded that she wasn't here and she should be with Emma if she wasn't with him. Then I saw Emma come up the driveway without Lena.
Panic set in. I asked Emma where Lena was, and she said, "She's too slow." So apparently they just LEFT HER!
I put Vivian in charge of Hanna (since the other two CLEARLY were not trustworthy at the moment), grabbed my keys, and went to rescue my child.
I found her easily enough, surrounded by moms (presumably) trying to comfort her. Oleg had also gone back on his bike. Lena was crying silently and scared out of her mind. I picked her up and put her in the car. Then I put her bike in the back. Oleg saw that I had it under control and turned back for home. I had to endure some criticism from those who found her. I just responded that it was more complicated than what they saw.
Once I got her home, I held Lena for about 20-30 min. until she relaxed and responded to me. I told her that she was not in trouble, that the older kids were wrong to leave her, that I love her and was worried about her, that I would always come for her. I don't know how much she understood, but she needed to hear it. She was stiff and emotionally shut down from the time I put her in the car. I just held her and talked to her until she relaxed and responded to me. Oddly enough that was when I asked if she wanted to help me cook dinner.
<<Now she's asking if she can go on a ride in the neighborhood. Must not be TOO traumatized!>>
I tried to explain to Oleg that what he did was wrong. Not sure how that went. He is now grounded from bike/scooter rides in the neighborhood until Cliff gets back this weekend.
Emma knows that we "Never leave a man behind!" Don't know what happened there. Also not sure what her consequences will be. We're starting with no computer time on our next computer day, but I don't think that is enough for the severity of the offense. Still need to talk to Cliff about the whole thing.
Oddly enough, I think this was a "good" thing. It gave me an opportunity to show Lena how important she is to me which is good for bonding. She and I have had some trouble in that department, and this may have moved us to another level.
She's out on her bike now.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Monday, April 11, 2011
Second Week Home
This was a LONG week. Cliff left on Monday to work out of the office in Virginia. That left me with the kids. We definitely feel his absence. Most of our time together is good. Some not so good. I can't remember the specifics of each day, so I'll just tell you some of what we've been doing.
We went to play at a friend's house. She has a daughter Lena's age and a son Oleg's age (in addition to an older daughter and a son between O and L). We had so much fun we forgot about taekwon do. Oleg climbed the tree in their backyard (quite well, I must say) and then played some video games. Lena and Hanna played mostly outside in the yard and in the hammock.
The older kids went to Weds night church activities. Oleg earned his TnT shirt and book (after only 2 weeks at AWANA) and was very proud of his achievement. Lena's teacher said she is doing well, too, but needs to learn some boundaries. Apparently she was kissing people. Hanna and I went to the grocery and dropped in on another friend until time to get the big kids.
Friday morning, my mother-in-law helped me get all the kids to the doctor at the International Adoption Clinic at Texas Children's Hospital. She sat in the waiting room with Emma and Vivian while I took the others to their appointments. Whole thing took about 3 hours. Thankfully their service included a Russian translator. All kids are healthy. Good news and not so good news, of course. I learned more about their life prior to the orphanage and us. And the doctor had some action items we need to pursue. Most is normal kid stuff.
We did not do blood work at this appointment. We are still waiting for our insurance to add the kids, and we did not want to take the chance that they would not cover the tests. So we will have to do all that after we get the insurance iron out. I thought it was important to have the kids seen ASAP, so we paid out of pocket (hoping for reimbursement). Don't know if insurance is going to be a problem or not at this point. Not worrying about it right now.
Oh, Oleg also informed me that Lena doesn't like me. I told him is was okay. He said, "it no okay." He's right, but I only meant that she's entitled to her opinion. Then I told him that she is my daughter just like he is my son, Hanna is my daughter, and Emma and Vivian are my daughters. Whether she like me or not, she's here to stay, and we'll just have to figure it out. She's having trouble with limits on her behavior, so its no wonder she doesn't like me. Just wish Cliff was here to take some of the heat with me!
Saturday, Emma and Vivian went on a field trip with their girl scout troop to the ASPCA. The rest of us stayed home. Then later in the afternoon we braved near 90 degree heat for Oleg's first soccer game. He had a good time, I think, and he's pretty good. Surprisingly, I got to watch a good amount of the game. The little girls behaved fairly well.
Sunday we got up early and made the 2+hour drive to Austin to visit Uncle John and his family. We went for Cousin Eli's 5th birthday party. Unfortunately, we missed the cake and most of the party, but we got to spend the rest of the day with them before heading back home. While there we had lunch at P.Terry's, played at John's house, went bowling, and had dinner at Craigo's Pizza. I have a dvd player in my Expedition, so we watched movies there and back to pass the time in the car. It was a long but good day.
Still having some sleep issues with Hanna, but I think we've found a good routine for the older kids. School-wise, Lena has asked for schoolwork, so I need to find the things I have in mind for her and get her started. We're mostly focusing on fine motor skills, building her English vocabulary, and letter forms and sounds. Oleg is doing better with math than I reported in the last post. We just had a language issue to get through. We also have cultural differences in how problems are written or presented that have made math less straightforward. Division facts are solid as is fairly simple long division. Next up is more practice with division and assessing fraction/decimal/percent knowledge. We will have more cultural differences there as well, but I'm prepared for it now! LOL!
We also played in the sprinkler, Hanna had her first pizza, Lena got a bike with training wheels, the older kids did several bike rides in the afternoons (one with Lena), and if I think of anything else we did, I'll add it later.
I have some pictures and videos to share, but I don't have a lot of time to get them uploaded. Will when I get a chance.
We went to play at a friend's house. She has a daughter Lena's age and a son Oleg's age (in addition to an older daughter and a son between O and L). We had so much fun we forgot about taekwon do. Oleg climbed the tree in their backyard (quite well, I must say) and then played some video games. Lena and Hanna played mostly outside in the yard and in the hammock.
The older kids went to Weds night church activities. Oleg earned his TnT shirt and book (after only 2 weeks at AWANA) and was very proud of his achievement. Lena's teacher said she is doing well, too, but needs to learn some boundaries. Apparently she was kissing people. Hanna and I went to the grocery and dropped in on another friend until time to get the big kids.
Thursday night Lena and I made pizza. I have some cute videos, but they are on my phone, and I need time to transfer to computer. So look for that (hopefully) sometime in the future.
Friday morning, my mother-in-law helped me get all the kids to the doctor at the International Adoption Clinic at Texas Children's Hospital. She sat in the waiting room with Emma and Vivian while I took the others to their appointments. Whole thing took about 3 hours. Thankfully their service included a Russian translator. All kids are healthy. Good news and not so good news, of course. I learned more about their life prior to the orphanage and us. And the doctor had some action items we need to pursue. Most is normal kid stuff.
We did not do blood work at this appointment. We are still waiting for our insurance to add the kids, and we did not want to take the chance that they would not cover the tests. So we will have to do all that after we get the insurance iron out. I thought it was important to have the kids seen ASAP, so we paid out of pocket (hoping for reimbursement). Don't know if insurance is going to be a problem or not at this point. Not worrying about it right now.
Oh, Oleg also informed me that Lena doesn't like me. I told him is was okay. He said, "it no okay." He's right, but I only meant that she's entitled to her opinion. Then I told him that she is my daughter just like he is my son, Hanna is my daughter, and Emma and Vivian are my daughters. Whether she like me or not, she's here to stay, and we'll just have to figure it out. She's having trouble with limits on her behavior, so its no wonder she doesn't like me. Just wish Cliff was here to take some of the heat with me!
Saturday, Emma and Vivian went on a field trip with their girl scout troop to the ASPCA. The rest of us stayed home. Then later in the afternoon we braved near 90 degree heat for Oleg's first soccer game. He had a good time, I think, and he's pretty good. Surprisingly, I got to watch a good amount of the game. The little girls behaved fairly well.
Sunday we got up early and made the 2+hour drive to Austin to visit Uncle John and his family. We went for Cousin Eli's 5th birthday party. Unfortunately, we missed the cake and most of the party, but we got to spend the rest of the day with them before heading back home. While there we had lunch at P.Terry's, played at John's house, went bowling, and had dinner at Craigo's Pizza. I have a dvd player in my Expedition, so we watched movies there and back to pass the time in the car. It was a long but good day.
Still having some sleep issues with Hanna, but I think we've found a good routine for the older kids. School-wise, Lena has asked for schoolwork, so I need to find the things I have in mind for her and get her started. We're mostly focusing on fine motor skills, building her English vocabulary, and letter forms and sounds. Oleg is doing better with math than I reported in the last post. We just had a language issue to get through. We also have cultural differences in how problems are written or presented that have made math less straightforward. Division facts are solid as is fairly simple long division. Next up is more practice with division and assessing fraction/decimal/percent knowledge. We will have more cultural differences there as well, but I'm prepared for it now! LOL!
We also played in the sprinkler, Hanna had her first pizza, Lena got a bike with training wheels, the older kids did several bike rides in the afternoons (one with Lena), and if I think of anything else we did, I'll add it later.
I have some pictures and videos to share, but I don't have a lot of time to get them uploaded. Will when I get a chance.
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