90-Days and counting

So it is now August.  I really did plan to write more over the summer.  I just didn't get it done.  Part of the reason is that we've had some pretty big things going on here.  I can't talk about it in this forum.  So if you're a close friend or family, contact me privately and I'll fill you in.

Today we are officially 3 months out from our dossier submission date.  So now we can start gathering the documents for our final submission before we travel.  Ukraine requires that all documents be dated within 3 months of the dossier submission date.  Our agency wants our documents one month ahead, so that gives me 2 months (60 days) to get it all pulled together.

I have already sent my request for certified copies of our marriage certificate.  We have our medical appointments set for Tuesday.  I need to check with the local branch of our mortgage company to see if they can provide the paper we need about our loan.  If not, then I have to deal with headquarters in Missouri (which requires a Missouri apostille and will take more time than a local document).  Cliff will get the employment letter from his office.  Its a start.

We also must still get our homestudy updated.  I have contacted the social worker, but haven't heard back.  We were on vacation for a couple of weeks, and it is possible that she is on vacation now.  School starts here on the 23rd, so I should be able to connect with her soon.

Feeling some pressure, because Cliff will be traveling again soon, and anything that needs his signature will be delayed if it comes in while he is gone.

Please keep praying for us and for our little girl.  Will update soon.

Come on. . . .Really?

Just heard from our agency (via email on the Friday before a 3 day weekend) that Ukraine now requires a home study to be less than 6 months old at the time we submit our dossier (11/11).  Ours will not be less than six months old, so we must update between now and submission.

What does this include?  Paying for our social worker to do an update.  Re-doing child abuse clearances, criminal checks, medical evaluations, finances, and references.  Sounds like a whole new home study to me!

I'm hoping that we can "piggy-back" on some of the info required for the dossier - like medicals and criminal checks.  Also hoping that our references can just change the dates on their letters and still count as references.

Cliff seems to think this new requirement could be fallout from the Russian adoption issue earlier this year. Maybe, but we both agree it doesn't really matter.  We have to do it, so we do it.


6/1/2010 UPDATE:

Talked to our agency today.  Turns out the update is specific to the state in which the adoptive parents reside.  Their email gave the requirements for the state where the agency is - which is not our state.  So now I have to find out what our state requires for a "complete" update.  Sounds like I need to contact our social worker. . . .Stay tuned. . . .

I-171H. . . .check (almost)

So we received our approval of our I-600A form yesterday.  YEA!  This was much faster than I expected.

BUT some of the information is incorrect.  The form allows us to bring home 2 children of either gender who are 0-3 years old with no special needs.  I know.  You're looking at 2 children of either gender and thinking that is the problem.  Actually, our agency told us to do it that way.  We don't HAVE to adopt 2 children.  But if we changed our minds in-country and DID want to adopt 2 children, this gives us pre-approval and less paperwork/travel time.  Same with gender.  So we did that part on purpose.  These approvals provide options once we are there.

No, the problem is with the age and special needs designations.  The I-171H approval form must match our home study, and our home study specifically states the age as 3-7 and the special needs category as "correctable."  Without these designations on our approval form, we will not be able to bring our child home without significant in-country difficulty.

So, I am in the process of fixing this.  After communicating with our agency,  I called USCIS and (amazingly) got through to the officer handling our case.  She is very nice and indicated that it should not be a problem.  She needs to pull our file and compare our home study to the approval letter to confirm the discrepancy.  And it should be fixed with little issue.

We'll see. . . .I won't breathe a sigh of relief on this until I see the corrected letter.  Fortunately we have plenty of time to get it fixed, so it won't slow us down at all.

Fingerprints . . . .check!

This morning Cliff and I drove in to the USCIS office and had our fingerprints (a.k.a. "biometrics") done for our I600-A.  This will kick off our background checks and result in approval of our application.  Amazingly, we were finished in less than 45 min.

One more thing to check off the list!

Passing Time

To pass the time, I started a craft project.  My girls both have hand made Christmas stockings.  Emma's was a gift, and I made one for Vivian.  When we started our adoption journey, I decided to go ahead and start one for our new child.  I have been working off and on since the first of January.  I knew with everything else going on in our household, it would take me a while to get it finished.  This is where I am so far.

USCIS Confirmation and Appointment

So, today we got our confirmation of receipt of our I600-A application AND our letters containing our appointment times for our biometrics (fingerprints).  YEA!

Our biometrics appointments are set for May 12th at 8:00 AM.  I'm still confirming with Cliff that he can do that date and time.  He is supposed to be out of town but mentioned that he may be in the office instead.

So until I hear differently, that's the plan.

Other things in the works

USCIS processed our check, so we should see our confirmation letter soon.  Hopefully our fingerprint appointment will be at a time when Cliff is in town, so we don't have to reschedule.

Made plans to pick up bunk beds from a friend on Saturday.  She says we will probably want to refinish or paint them, so that is likely in our future.

Made dossier payment to agency.

Rosetta Stone Russian Language program arrived today.

We are Official!

Heard from the agency this morning (email on my phone and then voice mail at home) that our documents were officially submitted and accepted at SDA in Kiev.  We are Officially In Line!

I was so excited to get the email!  I thought it would take longer to translate and submit.  I was planning to call the agency next Monday for an update.  So, I'm pleased that it didn't take as long as I thought it might.  I'm also thrilled that we have passed this milestone of getting registered.

The rest of our documents are due November 11th which means we must have them to our agency about a month before that.  Because Ukraine has specific requirements about how "recent" a document is, we don't start acquiring the rest of our documents until mid-August.  That gives us a couple of months to receive documents and get them authenticated before submitting to the agency (who will double check them before sending on to the facilitator in Ukraine).

I must admit that I felt a twinge of disappointment that our submission date is in November.  I was so hoping for October!  But November is good!

The timeframe from here (as we understand it, and subject to change) is:

mid-October - send completed dossier to agency who then sends to facilitator in Ukraine
November 11 - facilitator submits completed dossier to SDA
In a week or 2 - SDA reviews dossier and assigns date of referral appointment which is usually 4-6 weeks later.
mid- to late December - we leave for Ukraine

Like I said, everything after the 11/11 submission date is highly tentative.  What we DO know is that we are official, and we will experience Ukraine in the winter time.  Vivian is thrilled that she will get to see snow.  That's so Viv!

For now, we are on a bit of a hiatus.  We have plenty to keep us busy as we wait, so check back often.   We still have US immigration paperwork, home updates, doctors to locate (for Cliff and me and for our little one), and many other preparations to make.

Good News!

After a long weekend in Paris, our home study made it to Kiev one day ahead of schedule.  Yea!  Finally something going faster rather than slower!

Heard from the agency earlier today that the facilitator has already sent it out for translation.  Don't know how long that will take, but hoping less than a week.

We'll see.

Sigh of Relief

Today is our 20th wedding anniversary AND the date that our home study left the country to get us registered in Ukraine!  YEA!

We heard from the agency that our documents arrived.  Then later in the day we heard that they were on their way to Ukraine.  Hopefully we won't have much (if any) delay due to the volcanic eruption in Iceland.

From here, the process (as I understand it) is:

• Documents arrive in Ukraine
• Our facilitator has the documents translated
• Our facilitator files the documents with the SDA
• We get a date for submission of our full dossier

This should take a couple of weeks.  So hopefully sometime in early to mid-May we will have our dossier submission date (sometime in the fall).  We are told that our travel date should be about 4-6 weeks after dossier submission.  Things change, so that's just an estimate.

Also today I mailed our I600-A to USCIS.  That is the application to bring a foreign-born orphan into the US.  Once that application is processed, we will receive an appointment to have our fingerprints taken.  They will do a background check, request additional information if necessary, and then give us permission to proceed.

So now we are back to waiting. . . .

Whew!

After waiting 12 days, I finally got to take our documents to Austin for apostille!  Yea!

I finally had the documents in my hand late last night.  Believe it or not, after all the miscommunication and last minute requirements, UPS delivered our documents to the wrong address!!  Thankfully, though, it was our next door neighbor.  At 9:45PM I was on the phone with Cliff (he was in LA, en route to Australia) telling him we didn't have the documents, and he suggested that I go next door.  When I did (with him still on the phone) I found our envelope on their porch!

So the girls and I took off about 7:30 this morning.  We arrived about 9:45, parked, and were in the Secretary of State office by 10AM.  About 10 min. later we walked out with our authenticated documents.  YES!!

From there we met my brother for coffee (haven't seen him in a while), found some lunch, sent the documents to our agency, and headed home.

I thought I would feel better.  Don't get me wrong.  I did a happy dance as I walked out of the FedEx office.  I don't really know how to describe how I feel.  Worried that maybe we forgot something?  I just don't feel the relief I thought I'd feel.

Still Waiting . . . .

We have had some movement on the things that are keeping us from submitting our home study.

Mostly we're having communications issues.  I keep reminding myself that this process involves people and organizations with their own rules, bureaucracies, egos, and frailties.   It is still frustrating.

On Hold

We received our notarized home study last night, but we did not hear from the agency to know that it was a "go."  So no road trip to Austin today.  Disappointment #1.  Maybe Friday.

Heard from the agency this morning that they approved the final draft (YEA!)  But then we learned that we had to have our power of attorney returned with the home study, and it needs to be apostilled as well.

Okay, we can do that.  I took the documents to Cliff's office to have them notarized.  We can have them apostilled when we take the home study.  Whew!  We can still do this Friday and have the package to the agency by Monday morning.  It can be in Ukraine by the end of the week.

Additionally, the agency said that our social worker's license and her agency license need to be on separate pages AND they must be notarized separately and individually.  {insert tire screeching}  We don't have that.  Disappointment #2.  Definitely not Friday.

Ready for the last part?  The last draft of the home study that I saw did not include some of our financial information (that was the package that got lost in the mail in mid-March).  When I looked at it this morning (I don't know why I did), it is incorrect.  Disappointment #3.  Now we have to re-do part of the home study.  BUT, at least this is not the only paper we need from the social worker (see above).

So, I have been on a roller coaster this morning.  From hopeful that we can apostille and submit tomorrow to uncertain when any of this will happen.  I screamed.  I cried.  And now I am resigned.  This just isn't going to go smoothly.  Whining and crying and wishing it was different will not make it go any more smoothly.

I calmed down and called the social worker.  Left a message.

I emailed the agency to report the delay

We are farther along than we were, and that is good.

Did I mention I really don't like roller coasters?

Could it be? Is it really done?

I feel almost giddy!  I just talked to the agency, and our home study draft has been approved by their in country representative.  Now the agency's social work supervisor has to approve it.  If she approves, then we're good to go.  If not, then we'll have to make some corrections and re-submit.  Our social worker has already sent a notarized copy to us (should be here today).

So:

IF the SWS approves it today AND

IF we receive the notarized home study from our social worker today,

THEN we're making a road trip to Austin TOMORROW to get the thing apostilled and FedEx'ed to the agency!

Mind you, this is my timeframe, because I want it done immediately.  Maybe I need to take a breath and relax back into that supernatural calm of Easter morning.

Please pray that all goes smoothly.  IF we do go to Austin tomorrow, it will make a very busy day!

Supernatural Calm

This morning I sat on our covered patio in my pajamas with a cup of coffee ready to welcome Easter morning.  I had intended to watch the sunrise, but we had rain in the night and it was still wet and cloudy.   I closed my eyes and listened to the doves coo and the sparrows chirp.  The air was cool but heavy from the rain.  A soft breeze blew.

I opened my eyes and drank in the colors of spring.  From where I sat, I could see the deep red tips of our photinia hedge framed by the new green leaves on the trees.  Squirrels ventured out onto the wet tree limbs.  The last raindrops drip, drip, dripped from the roof.  I sat for many minutes, eyes closed, singing praise songs in my head and praying silently all the while listening to the sounds of creation around me.

"Odd," I thought.  Just 12 hours or so before I had gotten an email from our social worker responding to my inquiry about our home study.  I thought it was supposed to be mailed on Monday, and I should have it in hand.

Turns out it is "missing."  What?!?

Normally that would really freak me out.  Normally I would obsess about the fact that this puts us another week behind where I think we should be.  Normally it would ruin my mood and possibly the rest of the weekend.  Normally I would not truly rest until I knew that the document was on its way to me.  But not this time.

I puzzled over this supernatural calm until, in the middle of Easter Sunday Service, I heard two things that explained it for me.

First, the resurrection transforms disappointment into joy (see John 20:10-18).  Losing the home study is a disappointment.  Delay in this process is a disappointment.  But ultimately we WILL have the joy of holding our child in our arms.

Second, the resurrection transforms fear into peace (see John 20:19-23).  I had to back into this one.  I knew I was already feeling peace.  A peace I couldn't explain.  A peace that made no sense.  So, what was the fear?  Loss of control.  I was counting on her to get the home study to me, so I could stay on schedule.  Whose schedule?  Mine.  I am putting an enormous amount of pressure on myself to get the home study submitted as quickly as possible.  The sooner it is submitted, the sooner we get in line.  The sooner we get in line, the sooner we have our child in our arms.  I know I don't control much of the process, but I'm counting on things going "perfectly," because I want her home NOW!

So, yes, I do still feel disappointed that we are delayed.  But I will know the joy of meeting our child and bringing her home.  And I know that I will still struggle with wanting the process to conform to my wishes.  But for now I have peace.

She's waiting for us.  And God knows that.

Why Adopt?

To be perfectly honest, we were not looking for this.  When we discussed having a family, before we were married and in the early years, we agreed that we were both generally "open" to the idea of adoption.  I think at the time we thought of it as a contingency plan if we could not have "our own."  Once we had our girls, adoption was no longer a consideration.  Our family was complete.  We were content.

Until January 2008.  That is when our oldest daughter shared with us a dream.

In her dream, the angel Gabriel came to her and told her that God wanted us to adopt a child.  I will never forget what she said when I asked her why she thought God wanted us to adopt.  "Because we need to share our loving family with a child who needs a loving family."  {tears in eyes, lump in throat}

When I regained my composure, we also talked about how big a decision it is to adopt a child.  I told her that Daddy and I would need to talk about it and pray about it to confirm that expanding our family through adoption is really what we need to do.

Over the next year and a half, we looked first into domestic adoption and then into international adoption.  As we learned more, thought more and prayed more, we realized that adoption IS in our future.

Through that time, Emma was patient but quite persistent.  She prayed about "the adoption thingy" almost every night and remained insistent that this was the course that God wanted.

And now we agree.

So, why adopt?  Because we choose to share our loving family with a child who needs a loving family.

About Us

WHO: We are Cliff and Courtney, and we have been happily married for 20 years this month.   We have two daughters, Emma (11) and Vivian (9) whom we homeschool. We have always been open to the idea of adoption, but neither of us would have imagined what God had in store for our family!

WHAT: Adding a child to our family through international adoption.

WHEN: Hopefully before the end of the year!

WHERE: Ukraine